Radiohead - There There...Career Day 2
Bonnie sat in office filling out her own career application. Sid had inspired her to change her current job for something new. This would be a fresh start. "/Describe what personal qualities make you ideal for a career as a carer,/" she read aloud. Below on her application, she had drawn a snail. Clearly, she wasn't making any progress. She shook her head in distress.
"/I don't know!/" she murmured in distress. Bonnie sat back in her chair and sighed. This wasn't working. It was time to call for assistance. She picked up the phone and dialed for help. The woman held the receiver to her ear. It rang on the other line.
"/Hi, Sid's phone. Simon, please, get off, Simon! F**k off!/" the answer phone yelled. The phone beeped. Bonnie took in a deep breath.
"/Um... hi, Sid.../" she said. "/Uh... it's Bonnie, the careers lady. Um... uh... I was just ringing because you said that you'd help. Um... uh... I'm filling out this application form and, um... oh god I'm at the end of my rope, Sid! I can't do the job that I've got and I can't apply to get another one. Um... uh... I was just ringing just for your help really, because you just seemed really together and I thought maybe..." The phone beeped again.
"/The inbox for this number is full!/" the operator announced. Bonnie hung up in defeat. So much for that one. She got right back to work with her snail drawing. Suddenly, a mental shuriken fell onto her desk with a long clang. Bonnie sat up startled. She looked around for the source. No one was in sight. Bonnie looked around still. Ando popped up in front of her dressed up in ninja costume. Bonnie sat back startled again.
Case Subject #4: Ando:
The ninja held up his hand. "The way of the ninja is stealth!" Ando said like an old master. He ripped off his wrap-round mask. Bonnie looked at him confused still.
"I'm here because I've been told that you that can show me the path!" Ando said dramatically. He moved his right hand in the same manner. The careers woman still looked at him confused.
"/I-I don't know what you're talking about,/" Bonnie said. "/I'm the careers officer./"
"That's what I'm talking about!" Ando said. "Stealth, one-inch punches, ripping people's heart's out their chests!" The boy became excited. "I can retract my balls!" he announced. "With the power of my mind!" He tapped himself on the side of the head twice. He grinned at her proudly. The ninja straightened his clothes up some.
"What do you think?" he asked. Bonnie still looked at him confused. She shrugged at him likewise. Ando looked at her in disappointment.
"What?" he asked. "A Buddhist man can't be a ninja, huh?!? Is that it?!?" Bonnie shook her head confused. Ando became offended.
"I'll show you!!!" he shouted. He backed up some and began swinging his nunchucks around. Good, so far. But then, he hit himself in the nuts.
"Ow!" he whimpered. However, the idiot kept on with his act. Ando threw down the nunchucks and began busting out his own karate moves. Bonnie stared on at him confused. He even threw in the stereotypical screams with his act. At the end, Ando paused and smiled at her proudly. He returned back to normal. Bonnie stared on at him a bit.
"/Wow.../" she said. Ando grinned on at her.
"That's banging, isn't it?" he asked. Bonnie nodded a bit as she looked at him confused.
"So, who can you hook me up?" Ando boomed. "The Yakuza? the Chinese Triads? Ooo, ooo, ooo! The Italian mafia!" Bonnie shook her head at him still lost.
"I just want to be a trained killerrrrrrrrrr!!!!" he yelled stressing the syllables of the word "killer." He smiled at his words. The boy turned back to Bonnie. "Oh, oh," he added. "And help the poor and shit, on the side. Yeah!" Bonnie still stared at him lost.
"/I can't help you.../" she mumbled at last. Ando looked at her in disappointment.
"You're just like my mom!" he complained. "'No, Ando! Be a doctor! No assassination for you!'" The boy whimpered unhappily.
"What's the point?" he asked. He picked up his nunchucks and stormed out of the career's office, nearly crying. Bonnie watched confused and disappointed. Once again, she had screwed up on her current job.
Case Subject #5: Simon:
Bonnie laid her head down in stress moaning softly to herself. Simon was playing with one of the little trolls that she had on her desk. He looked over at her bored.
"/Look, can we get this over with, please?/" the charming bastard asked. Bonnie looked over at him some. She really didn't want to do this, but she had no choice. So, onward she went.
"/Your questionnaire says that you can be.../" she mumbled. The careers lady took a minute to look at Simon's form. "/Pretty much whatever you want./" Simon nodded a bit and looked around the room. Bonnie looked over at him with her face still on the desk.
"/What did you want to be when you grew up?/" she asked. There was a pause for a moment there.
"/Elvis!/" Simon answered quickly. Another pause came.
"/You wanted to be like Elvis?/" Bonnie asked him with her face still to the desk. Simon thought about that for a moment.
"/No, I literally wanted to be Elvis,/" he said. Bonnie sat up up on that one.
"/Yeah, you know,/" the charming bastard went on. "/Sing rock 'n' roll, become the king, die on a toilet. I think it's romantic./" Bonnie lowered her head back down on her desk.
"/This is wrong,/" she mumbled. "/I just wanted to make a difference./"
"/What?/" he asked. "/More a Beatles fan?/" He shook his head. "/This is a waste of my time!/" Bonnie breathed in some on her desk in disappointment. Simon leaned in close to her.
"/Hippie,/" he said, blatantly. Then, the charming bastard got up and walked out of the office. Bonnie moaned to herself again as she heard the door close.
Case Subject #6: Casper
Casper looked around in the office waiting. She leaned over the desk for a look. "/Um, are you alright?/" the hippie asked. Bonnie hid under the desk in more disappointment.
"/Yeah,/" she said in a slump. "/Uh... I'm quite comfortable actually. It's cozy in here. It's a bit like a shell!/" Casper sighed out annoyed.
"/This is pointless!/" she said.
"/I know,/" Bonnie mumbled.
"/I don't understand why I thought you would be any different!/" the hippie complained. "/No one takes me seriously!/" That caught the career lady's attention.
"/What?/" she asked. Casper sighed.
"/I'm like the brainless pretty hippie chick, right?/" she asked.
"/Well, actually,/" Bonnie spoke up. "/Your questionnaire shows that you've got a very good head for languages! And have you thought about going to university?/" Casper laughed a bit.
"/Ha! They wouldn't have me!/" she said. A pause came over them for a moment. Casper looked on confused.
"/Would they?/" she asked. Bonnie popped up from her desk.
"/Would you like to go?/" she asked. Casper looked on smiling. Then, she shook her head a bit.
"/Well I know it sounds stupid.../" she began. "/But, I guess.../" Bonnie smiled at her still. She began talking to the girl in French. Casper began talking back in the same language. Bonnie even asked Casper about the bruise on her left eye. The hippie explained what happened. They both giggled for a bit.
"/Listen, um... I know it sounds silly and I don't even think I know the French word for it. But would you like to look through some perceptives with me?/" Casper stared at her for a moment.
"/Are you sure?/" she asked. She shook her head a bit. "/I don't want to waste your time!/" Bonnie shook her head a bit.
"/Oh, no, no,/" she answered. "/I've got time!/" The careers lady balled up her own form and threw it away.
"/There's courses all over the country and pretty much you can take your pick wherever you'd want to study!/" she said as she reached onto her shelf and pulled out some college pamphlets.
"/Hm... far, far away!/" Casper said.
"/Well, what about the university of London!/" Bonnie shrugged.
"/Wow!/" Casper gasped. "/London!/"
"/I'm not even sure how challenging they are compared to Japan,/" the careers lady said. "/But as you can see.../"
"/Does it have a good reputation?/" the hippie asked.
"/Um, not really,/" Bonnie said. "/But it was the first city I could think of that was a long way away!/" Casper listened on intrigued.
Radiohead - There There...