Take On the World

Aisha was at it again. The church needed volunteers for the Sunday luncheon. The old biddy was all ready to sign up. Her friends? Not so much, as usual.

“Do we have to?” Clyde asked.

“Yes,” Aisha insisted. Her friends groaned aloud.

“What’s the matter?” the leader asked.

“Can’t we have a rest for a change?” Lewis asked. “You drag us around to do pointless things.”

“Helping the community and exercising are not pointless things,” Aisha said. “It’s a positive force.”

“For whom?” Muriel asked.

“Everyone!” the leader insisted. The other three old biddies fell on the ground, groaning. Aisha sighed and laughed nervously. This is going to be another challenge, she thought.

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Tucker flipped the sign to open. He looked toward the house part of the Sunny Plum and frowned. Annie had taken Greg under her wing as her project. Already, the café owner felt pity for the young man. His wife could be quite a drill sergeant when it came to manners. On the first day, Greg collapsed on the café floor before the day was over. Tucker had to drag him away and put him outside. That was three days ago. He would be surprised if Greg lasted this week.

“Have you owned the café yet?” Annie shouted from within the house. Tucker jumped straight to his feet.

“Yes!” he said.

“Is it clean?”

“Of course it is!”

“I will be coming out there to check!”

Her husband rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah.”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing, dear!” Tucker dropped his shoulders and walked into the kitchen to start cooking for the day.

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As she predicted, Aisha had a time dragging her friends to the church. Clyde never went to church to begin with. Lewis and Muriel dragged her with them reluctantly.

“Come on,” Lewis whispered. “You have to suffer through this with us. The sooner we get this over with, the sooner we can plan our escape.” The dirty old biddy frowned. When has that sentence ever worked out? Aisha pretended not to hear the farmer conspiring once again. Instead, she pushed open the heavy wooden doors.

“I’m here!” she announced. “And I brought my friends!” Lewis, Muriel, and Clyde looked around to make their escape as soon as possible. The leader of the Women’s Bible Study Group nervously chuckled when she saw Aisha dragging the old biddies towards her. She forced herself to smile when they were inches away.

“I’m so glad you made it!” she said with a fake happy-sounding voice.

“Reporting for duty!” Aisha said with a salute.

“Right…” the Bible Study leader said. Lewis and Muriel could read the true expression on her face.

“Yes, we know how you feel,” their eyes told her. “We don’t want to be here. She pulled us along. We just wanted to stay home.” Clyde scratched her head and smelled the dirt under her fingernails.

“Give us the day for today,” Aisha said. The Bible Study leader nodded while shaking.

“Uh… yeah. Come with me,” she said with her façade starting to crack. The old biddies followed her down the hall to the fellowship room.

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Greg cleared his throat as he walked up to Clover’s house. He tightly clutched as bouquet of wild flowers in his hand. This time, the young man was going to get his romantic intentions across loud and clear to his crush.

“Clover, you look beautiful today. I really fancy you, have done so for a long time. Would you like to go out with me?” Greg rehearsed. “Clover, you look beautiful today. I really fancy you, have done so for a long time. Would you like to go out with me? Clover, you look beautiful today. I really fancy you, have done so for a long time. Would you like to go out with me? Clover, you look beautiful today. I really fancy you, have done so for a long time. Would you like to go out with me?”

He made it to the front door.

“Clover, you look beautiful today. I really fancy you, have done so for a long time. Would you like to go out with me?” the young man said one more time. He gave himself a quick nod before knocking on the door. Today was going to be the day.

Greg frowned when William greeted him at the door.

“Yes?” the old man asked.

“Uh… Is Clover here?” Greg asked.

“No,” William said.

The young man’s face went flat. “No?”

“She and Liz went out with Liz’s friends into the city for the day. They won’t be back until tomorrow morning.”

Greg dropped the flowers before passing out on the doorstep. William gently kicked him in the head.

“You okay?” he asked. “Oi. Oi!”

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Clyde stood around in the area behind the church with a shovel in her head. She stared at the sky with her mouth agape. Inches away, Aisha looked up and shook her head.

“Hey!” she shouted. “Quit standing around, dazed! We have work to do!” The dirty old biddy pretended not to hear her. The leader rubbed her forehead. Just like last week, she thought. Aisha put down her shovel and marched over to Clyde.

“Oi! Oi!” she shouted as she shook her on the shoulder. The dirty old biddy didn’t respond, but she flashed two fingers behind her back. Lewis and Muriel looked up and caught the signal. The old biddies nodded to each before throwing down her shoulders and taking off running. Clyde smirked and took off running herself. Aisha’s face turned bright red.

“Hey! Come back!” she yelled as took off running after her friends.