Godlike Barracuda

Animal House has a new spiriualist visitng them. Noiz wandered down the hall when she heard a low chatter. Hm? She followed the sounds to the dining hall. The boys sat crowded around a woman with bright blonde hair sitting in the center of the room. This lady held her hand over an old book. Noiz slowly walked into the dining hall as the woman mumbled something under her breath. The kitty came up next to one of the guys in the crowd.

"Who the hell is this?" she whispered. The boy glanced over his shoulder at her.

"Haven't you heard?" he asked. Noiz tilted her head at him.

"No..."

"No?"

"Why would I be asking other wise?"

The boy shook his head, smiling. "She's the great Ryoko-sama."

"Okay, so?" Noiz asked. He grabbed her by the hands.

"She is wonderful!" the boy shouted. "She can talk to the dead!" Noiz glanced over at the blonde woman. The lady looked out into the crowd.

"Is there a Martin here?" she asked. The boy next to Noiz looked up with big eyes.

"Ooo! That's me!" he said.

"Do you know someone named Jane?"

"Yes! She was great-grandmother."

"She is here with us now."

Noiz rolled her eyes. Really? Martin looked around.

"Where? Where?" he asked. Ryoko-sama chuckled.

"You can't see her," she said. Of couse you can't, Noiz thought. She's not in the room. Ryoko put up her hand.

"But," I said. "I can hear her."

"What is she saying?" Martin asked.

Ryoko-sama closed her eyes. "She's says... you will do fine this semester. Do not worry." Martin took in a breath and Noiz rolled her eyes. This is stupid, she thought.

"Thank you!" he shouted with a bow.

"Fake!" Noiz shouted. All eyes fell on her.

"Don't you get it?" she asked. "This woman is a fraud!" Ryoko turned back to the crowd.

"Is there a Graham here?" she asked.

"Yes!" Mosh and Noiz's British friend spoke up.

"Do you know a Brian?" she asked. Graham thought about her question.

"Maybe," he said. "Would this Brian have a cock ring?" Jun hit him on the arm.

"Graham!" she exclaimed. Ryoko-sama regained her composure.

"Anyway, who's next?" she asked. Noiz marched up to her.

"Cut this crap out, you phony!" she snapped. Ryoko-sama looked her in the eye.

"Do you have a friend named Andrew?" she asked. The kitty raised an eyebrow at her.

"Why?" she asked.

"He has died in New York last night," Ryoko-sama said. Noiz turned and walked away. However, the problems would only double for her.

Back in her dorm, she found all of her things packed up by the door. She tilted her head with a blank stare. What the hell is this?

"Mosh-kun!" she said. "What's going on here?" The mouse peaked around the corner.

"You can't come in here!" he shouted. Noiz gave him a strange look.

"Why?" she asked.

"Ryoko-sama said that spirits are angry that we're together."

His girl gave him a strange look. "What?"

Mosh frowned at her with his ears drooping. "I love you, but we just can't be together. Goodbye." He disappeared into the room as Noiz pondered the situation. Something's not right here, she thought. The kitty decided to do a little investigating.

Noiz did her research in secret during the week and came across her answer. The kitty smiled at the screen. On top of that, Ryoko-sama would be holding her seminar this Sunday. Perfect!

The boys gathered on Sunday to hear Ryoko-sama speak. Jun introduced her to the stage.

"Good afternoon," she said. "Here is our guest speaker tonight, Ryoko-sama!" The psychic walked up to the potem with a room full of applause.

"Thank you," she said. The woman was just about to speak when a projector screen sank down behind her and showed a porno movie starring her. Jun fainted off stage. Ryoko-sama whipped around, shocked.

"What the--?!" she screamed. The boys howled and cheered at the screen as it got racier. Ryoko-sama tried to explain herself away to the rowdy audience.

"That was the old me!" she shouted.

"Oh really?" a loud voice boomed. "This movie was made last week!" A loud gasp filled the room as Noiz walked on stage. Ryoko-sama's face turned bright red.

"You!" she shouted. The woman stomped off stage with the kitty grinning.

"You're nothing but a fraud!" she yelled. Noiz turned and walked off stage.